its June
and I thought I’d be
gone by now
memories of the night
I turned my first trick
replay in my mind.
thought they would have faded
but I remember a year ago
being bent by a stranger
on the M train
my body,
intoxicated
too weak to fight back
slurring “no” and “stop”
and I knew he heard me
even if my protest
did fall upon deaf ears

its been a year since the rape
and I thought I’d be gone by now.
emotional scars.
drunken attacks.
friendships lost in the mist…
because I couldn’t go back to see him
could take that same
M train again.
these wounds still have not healed
but its June.
I thought I’d be gone by now
and I’m still here